Thursday, December 11, 2008

Grumbling Again..

Have you ever feel tired in your life? Not because of work but more on ‘yourself’.  Yes I did and I hate it the most. Now I’m realized what drove me more tired than other routine of life. But I cannot do anything. I can feel my heart crushed inside of my chest. My brain tired of repeating the best solution or answer to give it to the best. Tired of hoping, misled, pleasing but always become number 2 , laughing to make it easier to people  and tired of giving all that I have to get nothing in return except the scars. 

Tired of reflecting on memories by wanting them to last forever. Living in the false hope and know is not true but no strength to believe it. Feel tired for something I want too but cannot obtained, waiting and seeing things through from broken windows, listening to the promises but never come true.  And yes I’m feeling down because of being hurts, played, lies, alone, tears, alone, jerk, games and ….. dead ends.

I’m tired by letting my life being in other people hands and tired of answering their demands. The future is coming and I can’t let it ruined by living in the past. I’m really looking the way to come out and wished for the super strength to leave it behind.

Why are you cast down. O  my soul, why you disquteted within me?. Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him, my help and my God

(Psalm 42:11)


  1. been there, done that Alv....
    Be strong, have faith in your prayers. Put all your burdens in the 'Something-for-God-To-Do Box", Offer your life to HIM..everything..and let Him works inside you.

    Remember..I always tells this to my friends - "If It Doesn't Kills You, It Will Make You Stronger." you are stronger than you thought. GBU.


  2. CaLvB > I understand how you feels. Yes..we do feel tired of many things. Just a few weeks ago, i was depressed with some things. to be specific, the wrong decisions i made which are now bothering my life. However, I remembered in the bible, JEsus prayed like this "Lord, let not take away the problems and hardship from them, but give them strength to live so that they will always rely on Me" I can't remember which verse. But, you can take a look at new testament, the end part of St John i think. Be strong.

  3. hurmm..kenapa sya rasa post kau nie..macam sya punya feelings juga..haha..bila sya baca..macam sya baca tulisan sya sendiri juga.
    hurmm ada persamaan kita nie..

  4. hi Alv,
    i have to agree with merapu itu baik untuk kesihatan. sometimes, i feel the same too.
    especially when you say "Tired of reflecting on memories by wanting them to last forever." i guess too many good memories in the past and, i think that's one of the way for us to keep going and make us happy in times of sadness.well, that's how i keep myself going, sometimes..
    i wish you strength Alv, and always remember that God will always be there.
    Cheers! =)

  5. Wah alv btul ooo.. we have the same feeling and experiences...and we try to do our best but still not enough.. people want more even we oredi gave the best.. dunno la.. maybe this is the world without satisfaction.. this is life???? now im very tired.. now i lost hope.. now i just want to run i feel like want to give up.. dunno.. so tired oredi.. how i envy with those beside God.. oh my God...... help me.. dunno wut to do anymore..

    Sedih oo kan.. life treated us like that.. * hugs Alv

  6. Oh yeah, been there, done that. I sooo totally understand how u feel. Sometimes I feel that way unexpectedly at times. But in any case, I wish u all the best in getting over it. I always tell myself "It's good to be alive!" In time, I start to believe it. try it.

  7. ... hmmm Have you ever feel tired in your life? yes!
    Im tired of everything, no one ever understands me and yes! memories does killing me to the grave! im sick of humanity-attitute ~(watever)

    ...u dont deserve these~ not to anyone else too! its good to know that u hav ur own belief.. but hoping isnt the way.. do something.. n try to chill on..

    hurts..? chill harder..! that wat i do.. n some pple think im insane..watever lets kick some ass then..?

    pick a date n we'll go have some fun! >:)

  8. :) napa ko? ko panat kah? bah.. minum air banyak2 ah.. jan selalu panat2.. sian ko.. harus selalu senyum dan tenang.. :)

  9. penat penat tu biasala alv, ko doa ja banyak2 hehe

  10. "be strong, have faith, think positive" those are just plain rubbish, imma tell you something, do what you think it will be best for you, but do it before it gets worse, don't let all the weight on tomorrow when you can live free today, don't be a prisonier of your own life, kick everything in your path and feel good about it, spit it out in their face when they blame you for their problems, be yourself and stop taking care of others wounds when you're almost empty.
    just do it, forreal
    you're a Woman,
    spread your wings and be free!

  11. Angel Bear..Yes I'll do that and always do 'work' to just sometimes feel like nobody cares....yes I believe that I more stronger now..

    Willie..the verse are in the Gospel of John..

    Webber..mmg kita ada persamaan.. kekeliruan..saya dpt rasa melalui ko punya post2

    S.Teo..thanks a lot GBU

    Nadia.. let us keep strong ok? hehhe

    Miss No Other..yeah!! Good to be alive...

    Beck.. nanti kita atur time jumpa and minum2 hehehe..

    Pirut, satu dorom sdh sa minum air..nda juga hilang tu penat.. mungkin mau minta 1 dorom Holy Water ni dari Father hehhehe

    Gagaukan.. yes..keep praying

    Claudel..thanks for visiting me.. and thanx for the advise. Really appreciate it

  12. sy pun selalu penat sumandak....banyak yang mau kana pikir...kadang2 cm mau pi mati is really suck