Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Letting Go In Valentine..

Many people have their stories about relationship with loved ones either it is family, partner, friends or colleagues. The stories of being hurts, cheated or betrayed. And some people have experiencing something terrible themselves and carry a burden of guilt and shame. Hurt can be especially excruciating if it is inflicted by someone we thought cared for us or someone who is supposed to love us. This sort of incongruity can make us crazy. We just can’t believe it. It makes us so overwhelmed, confused, shocked or wounded that we become fixated on our misfortune. We just can’t get over it. It’s easy to feel self-pity or even to become sour on life, bitter and twisted. If we are the injured party we might rage at injustice, feel hatred for those who hurt us, construct elaborate fantasies of revenge. We can become obsessed with our pain.

I have a friend who have been betrayed by her own good friend. The one who supposed to be part of her life. The double betrayal was more than she could endure. Like many people her life is in limbo and will remain so until she manages to let go of her pain and outrage. She is the only one suffering and she is hurting herself as least as much as her happy time with her ex. I’m not only talking about her (but also to me hehehhehee… )

For our own sakes, for peace of mind and our future happiness we must let go of what we cannot change and forgive for all the wrong things happen not just for them but also for ourself. We need to mentally, emotionally and perhaps physically detach and disengage from the people who hurt us, the events we cannot change, the problems we cannot solve. We know that nothing and no one can change what is past. Obsessing about past events locks us into reacting rather than acting independently. It reduces our freedom. We are a slave to the past.

The good things that we can do is to revenge it by living well, live in the moment and allow life to happen, let go of regrets about the pasts and fear of the future for what it might be happen and refuse to carry the burden of bitterness and resentment which stop us from being happy.

‘God grant me the serenity. To accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference’

Since this is month of Valentine the love thingy one.. I like to wish Happy Valentine to all people I love and to be love. But very seldom people want to wish ‘Happy Valentine’ for those who hurt them kan? hehhehe…anyway forgiving love is the greatest love of all. Even it is difficult but it’s worth for life…. Even though I might not celebrate it, but I’ll treasure all the loves which is given to me and shared it around..hehehheheee..


  1. Sometimes it is hard to accept what we cannot change,but its a good thing if we can accept the thing that we cannot change.

  2. I know how u feel Ms No one. :-) Happy V Day to you. Takda org, kita sendiri-sendiri saja lah kan. :-)

  3. Everything happens for a reason.

  4. I felt the same too Alv...but life is like dat..

  5. Ms No One,

    Believe me, God will provide you the right person at the right time. Let God handle the rest. Just enjoy your life to the fullest. "patah tumbuh, hilang berganti..." hehe...

  6. Antanumite,
    Yes I agree with this

    Ms One Other,
    Happy Valentine to you too..Valentine for everybody mah kan..kekekkekee

    Thanx for keep telling me that..hehehe

    Dont make that kind of 'life' stop you from being happy ya

    Ms Rhythm,
    'patah tumbuh hilang berganti?' hehehe..tak payah la tumbuh tu..tanam yang lain wakakaka..anyway, yes surrender all to God..

  7. For a second there I thought this entry was about losing virginity on Valentine's Day! :-D

  8. Happy Valentine to Everyone.. spread the love :)

  9. If we never feel the pain,there's no way to know how 'happy' feels like.

    Anyway,happy valentines from me to you :)

  10. Daniel,
    Got such things meh? hehehehe...

    Always agree one arr..

    Yup..happy valentine..

  11. nah.....jadi cam mana ko punya valentine day ari nie? sama siapa ko mau sambut? hehehehesambut sam sia buli kah?

  12. there are so many things in life that we sure take for granted... nothing is permanent... so while it is there, let us all enjoy and cherish every moment because one day, it may all be gone. only one thing is permanent... the love that our God has for each one of us. hopping by here today from eugene's BOLD-TALK. love your blog and very nice post. God bless! ciao!

  13. Andrik,
    Buleh bah kalo ko..nanti ko pos ja tu pokok kayu yang depan tempat keja ko tu sama sia..wakakkaka

    Hi..thanx for visiting. Thanx for the comment also ya..very meaningful..God bles you too

  14. The strongest that could be found in person is the analitical thinking! You are the King/Queen for ur self.. What should happen to you is depend how you command urself! good or bad is no differences.. Saying we're GOOD, but could be BAD to others..!

    Who's understands you better that ur self?
    So all the bad memories should be 'deleted' from the heart.. Assuming it as a 'virus' that could damage ur PC's hard disk... Then urself as the well updated antivirus software..
    Hahahahahaha.. Just my opinion lorrr..

    Happy Valentine all..! GBU

  15. Hi John,
    Wah.panjang lebar penjelasan ko ah..hehehe..anyway, i agree with you la

  16. i love it. we must let go of what we cannot change
    You bring a positive influence on peoples life
    Thank God. :)